Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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