Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
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