Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
