Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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