Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
