Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
