I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
