All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize