he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
