Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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