Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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