he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
