What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize
