Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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