it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
