Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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