Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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