yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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