don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
