it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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