My room smells like vodka and shame
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Couch. On fire.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize