Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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