So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
