Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
