I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
