i jhust puked up my retainher.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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