we have pet lesbian snakes
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
