I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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