Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize