actually, I'm a sock model
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
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