Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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