There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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