If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
