there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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