My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
