My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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