would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
No idea. I blame fireball.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it