I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
