Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
