I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize