why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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