carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
