it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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