I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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