just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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