it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
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