So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
