Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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