he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
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I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
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I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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