How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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