a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
These tits shall not be calmed
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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